Memorable Gaming Moments - Part One

Growing up in the 90s meant there were only two things worth caring about in my life- football and computer games. From morning to midnight my friends and I would play football then retreat to one of our houses to dwindle the remaining hours of the day away on a Playstation, GameBoy or even a Sega Master System II. Inspired by this list, I have compiled my own list of memorable gaming moments, most from my childhood, some more recent. I hope, and expect, many of you will also remember one or two...

List (in no particular order):

1. Tomb Raider and the T-Rex (Playstation One)

One of the first games I thoroughly enjoyed, got right into and actually managed to complete was Tomb Raider, an absolute classic of a game. Picture the scene: you find yourself in a grand open space and see a handful of dinosaurs running at you. As an 8/9 year old it's scary. Imagine the pride well up when you lodge a bullet in the head of each one and gaze in awe as they hit the floor, proud of your work. Then behind you outsteps that. F************cccckk! pretty much sums it up.

2. Metal Gear Solid - Cyborg Ninja (Playstation One)

My god, even now I get chills thinking about him. As if MGS wasn't hard enough when you were a kid, now I'm confronted by a NINJA!!!! Then I find out he can turn INVISIBLE!!!! Then I find out I have to FIGHT him!!!! I was genuinely scared of this thing, I'll never forget the butterflies in my stomach as I stood still in fear and an invisible samurai sword hacked my every body part at will. Back then, bosses were bosses and this was one bad ass boss.

3. Adidas Power Soccer - The Beckham Chip (Playstation One)

My first ever football game was Adidas Power Soccer for PSOne. I always remember the cover, with the weird mime fella as the keeper and the bit too short shorts on the player. In game, I would always go Everton and always play Grasshoppers; I liked the name! I used to set the match length to 30 minutes or something silly and just score goal after goal until I reached 100-0, then the scoreboard seemingly crashed and any the score wouldn't change no matter how many more goals you inflicted on the poor Grasshoppers. I must have shipped over 2000 goals against the poor souls in total easily. The strongest memory of the game, though, is that if you were in desperate need of a goal all you had to do was run to the halfway line facing your own goal and press shoot. The player, no matter how crap, would then swivel and blast a chip over the opponents keeper from the halfway line- every time without fail! This was my first football game and really got me started on my love for football and for that it deserves a place on my list. P.S. I couldn't find any videos of the infamous chip glitch so here's a gameplay vid- the graphics and AI are breathtaking I'm sure you'll agree. Or not.

4. Altered Beast - The Transformation (SEGA Master System II)

Altered Beast was my favourite game on my SEGA Master System (II). I honestly don't know how I never completed it, as it is notoriously one of the easiest and fastest games to complete of the era. I was only around 6 at the time, though, so that's my excuse! I'll never forget the change in music when you finally collect the 3 orbs that transform you into a random beast. The werewolf, as shown above, is my favourite and I'm sure at least one of you reading this will be familiar with this game. NOTE: You can now download the original version on the App Store.

5. Michael Jackson Moonwalker - Club 30 (SEGA Genesis)

An unforgettable game- the slightly disturbing 'owww's and 'heeee's, the famous MJ kick that shot magic dust that killed 18 stone mobsters and, of course, that suit. But the most memorable part of the game, for me, was the very beginning when he enters the club looking cool as f*ck and, just like the music video, flips a coin that lands directly in the jukebox slot! Now that's talent. Moments later an 8 bit version of Billie Jean hits and off you go shooting a magic white substance at men and saving children.

No comment.

6. Pokemon Blue/ Red - Choosing your first Pokemon (GameBoy Color)

Sooo many scenes and parts to choose from but, for now at least, I'm gonna stick with the truly defining moment in any Pokemon game; choosing your first Pokemon. If I remember correctly, the 3 to choose from were Squirtle, Charmander and Bulbasaur. I used to save before this scene on each playthrough until I got Charmander. Once chose, this little mix of pixels soon becomes like a real life sibling and you're willing to protect it with your (virtual) life HP. Another magical moment comes when, finally, after days and probably too many hours of training your friend up he or she evolves! The naming of your rival, battling of gym leaders, buying your first bicycle and the music, the droning music!! Memories, memories! :)

P.S. Again, couldn't find the suitable video so here's some music. The memories will come flooding back!

7. Metal Gear Solid 4 - Raiden vs Vamp

Finally, any players of MGS4 will undoubtedly share the same view as me when I say the cutscenes with Raiden are absolutley stunning. However, it is this one that remains the strongest in my mind. Vamp, an immortal boss is renowned for his agility and blade skills. Raiden is also, thus making this a fine battle. So many things go through your head as they square off; will Raiden be killed, will-somehow-he manage to destro Vamp? Will both die? This scene is a gaming classic and shows the developer's skills pefectly, never have I played such a beautiful looking and flowing game. MGS is famous for its cutscenes and this is why...

And, fittingly, that stunning scene marks the end of Part One. I'll be back soon to compile another list of memorable gaming moments, I'm certainly not short on them! I hope you enjoyed this lighter approached article and hope to see you again soon!

The Photoshop Look

A couple in America are trying to scrap the perfected images of women that we see everyday on magazine covers, on television and even on page 3.

[You can read the article here]

It is worrying that you can turn a grey, scaly coke head into a glamorous supermodel type idol so easily. No doubt kids have a different kind of pressure today to when I was growing up. Smooth skinned beauties were still on covers back then but the editing seems to come under more scrutiny each year and the waists are getting thinner, breasts bigger and skin so smooth it looks like they've been ironed.

Take Lindsay Lohan, who has just done a Playboy shoot. Why? What has she done so great to land such a prestigious offering? In the article you can clearly see the resemblance and link to Marylin Monroe. I think it's a disgrace to compare such a celebrated idol (with actual talent) to such a... what does she do? I remember watching her in Parent Trap but can't remember anything else...

'She's America's most fascinating Celebrity' they claim. Jesus, how desperate are they for a bit of gossip? To compare a legend, who girls worldwide looked up to and wanted to be, to Lohan is a joke. It's the same mentality we have over here. Talentless 'celebrities' whose work has dried up so the next logical step is to get their t*ts out or sell a story. Or release a sex tape. Or go on Big Brother, take your pick.

You can't deny that in the article they have made her look like a beautiful pin up girl from the past and somewhere, somehow, a young girl will see these images and feel that little bit smaller because even Lindsay Lohan, a celebrity charlatan can look like a Miss World competitor.

I honestly hope the couple I linked to make a breakthrough. Let's be honest, if we want to see a bit of skin we can find it on the internet with 20 seconds, so why fill shelves full of such images when kids are guaranteed to be present? I always thought Playboy had a certain classy, traditional reputation. But with this message of 'take drugs to get in the media and you can pose for us', I'm afraid they've let themselves down immensely.

Earth 2.0 discovered but will we ever see it?

Scientists this week have discovered a new planet that seems to display very similar qualities to our own planet. Very exciting news, however it's over 600 light years away and there would take 600 years to get there. Who knows, maybe I'll still be going by then? Seriously though, I envy the people of the future. Well, maybe. It all depends on how we develop as humanity, not as individual countries but as one race. In 600 years will we still be fighting wars over oil and invisible weapons of mass destruction? Probably not, but I'm sure there'll be something to fight about. Will we still even be here? Or will we have had World War 3 and wiped ourselves out? Frightening thought, but maybe not so far fetched as one may like to believe.

This article makes me wonder how many other planets are like ours. Take into consideration the sheer size of the universe and, personally, I think life on other planets is almost guaranteed. We aren't even a speck of the finest dust in the universe and yet some are still ignorant enough to think we are the only, and strongest, form of life.

The picture used also made me wonder what our planet will look like from space in 600 years. Perhaps it will almost completely blue due to global warming, or perhaps a drought is in store and the majority of the water disappears? Perhaps the great continents of today will only be half their size due to a major earthquake/ tsunami? Who knows...

If this dream of exporting humanity to another planet was ever to be achieved would we be arrogant enough to then try and take the land's resources from our new planet and slowly destroy Earth 2.0 as we have here? It wouldn't surprise me...

My Winter

This is a continuation of my post on DD...

It's getting cold now, very cold. No longer will a t-shirt and jeans combo do; the heavy coats and jackets come out along with the scarfs, gloves and ridiculous bobble hats. But, for once, style doesn't rule substance; as long as your teeth aren't chatting away without consent, looks don't matter.
All this is winter.

Delightful nights in front of the television with the heating on accompanied by close family and dark days out and about with friends and cups of hot chocolate from Costa.
All this is winter.

Rudolph noses, frozen digits, chapped lips and aching joints. All these are winter.

Christmas shopping, same shabby Christmas trees being dragged out the loft, same sharp intake of breath as you step outside from the glorious warmth into the sense tingling bitterness. All this is winter.

Stress of what to buy who for Christmas, dwindling funds, what to have for Christmas dinner, Christmas cracker cracking, advent calendar opening, Christmas candle lighting, Christmas stocking filling, waiting for the 25th day of the twelfth month. All these make warm memories in winter...

A Touchy Subject... Still

This is a story I was told by my girlfriend tonight as she got home from work...

Basically, whilst in work, two black (I'm not sure if that's the PC term or not so forgive me) girls asked her whether they sold a certain product in the store. As she essentially only works on 'her' aisle, there are certain products she is less clued up about than her specialist products. Hence when they asked she answered I don't think we sell x product sorry. Anyhow, a few minutes later one of the girls came back to her friend who was standing nearby with the said product and said 'they do sell x, look' to which her friend replied 'what the f*ck?! Why the f* ck did she tell us they didn't?! I'm f*ckin saying something to her!'

Her friend, sensing tension, told her to leave it as it was an honest mistake.

'But what the f*ck? Is it because we're black?' was her answer.

Seriously, in a week were racial comments have been in the news, why are we still at the stage where you can't even answer a question without someone being offended? Obviously racism is wrong and I'd never condone it but come on, some if the cases you hear are ridiculous. If we truly want an end to such problems, people need to be a little more open minded, a little more open and not as defensive. I hate this 'race' thing anyway, if i have a white cat and a black one, I don't class them as black and white, just cats. Maybe that comparison isn't fair... Or maybe it is, why is it such a grey area? All I know is that when a girl comes home from work unsettled and afraid they've offended someone for answering a question in a non threatening genuine manner then that tells me we're still too uptight about certain issues than we need to be. When are we going to try and move on and make racism a topic of yesteryear?

Vampires and Werewolves Roam Amongst Us

They do. At least they think they do. If you, like me, watched the documentary on Channel 4 the other night about real life vampire and werewolf cults in America, you'll know what a shambles the very idea is.

'Teen Vampires' it read as the show kicked off and I sat on the couch with the lights off ready to be amazed and scared shitless by a savage group of descendants from Transylvania. How very very disappointed I was. Turns out the whole documentary was centred on a group of kids in America who dress in black and desperately seek attention. You could see some were future murderers looking for a reason for their impending actions.

'I belong to the wolves and crave blood'. No mate, you're an attention seeker. One silly bitch even started swaying declaring she felt 'drunk' after licking the blood of a friends arm. What an absolute farce. Ready to turn over, I reached for the remote when a stout woman appears on screen identifying herself as one of the kids' mothers. Here's the part she tells her adolescent daughter to stop wearing plastic fangs, get a job and some friends... surely? Nope, she invites the group in and gives one of them a huge kitchen knife and asks him to cut himself. The soft bastard nearly slices him arm off as blood flows from the wound. Presumably they all 'feasted' well that night.

How then can one call these vampires? They don't turn to bats, don't turn to ash in sunlight and one even had a Spiderman t-shirt on. Some claimed to be wolves, not vampires. What makes these different you say? Well, they don't like the vampires in the group for a start. Er, that's it actually. Well I despise all these kids, what does that make me? A goblin? A troll? A bat-wolf hybrid?

Apparently, this craze is sweeping American schools. Some even chain each other together as, like a wolf, they pick a mate. And they wonder why they don't fit in? Anyone did that in my school the chain would be round their neck before they could say Robert Pattinson. These are essentially the attention seeking emo kids from school, with extras. Basically, they moan about being different then claim to be just that. Then go home, cut themselves and claim it's in their nature to do so.

In all seriousness though, it was sad to see some of these formerly driven kids reduced to sitting in a room full of candles, obviously depressed, and making excuses that it's normal as they're vampires. I was looking forward to the new Twighlight movie, but if it's just going to be Robert Pattinson sitting on his arse in his room all day with his Spiderman pyjamas on crying I think I'll pass.

Note: You can watch the said episode here.

Back in Business

Ahh it's good to be back!

As you can see, I've completely revamped the site with a fresh name and look. The principle stays the same; a cauldron of various topics put across in my own way. I'll start posting again very soon, in the meantime I'll be painstakingly editing various elements on the site...